An Ode to my Little Blue Phone

I bought a new phone. And it is a flashy one too. And while I should be excited to turn off my little blue phone for the last time and tuck it in a drawer of old electronic devices, I feel sad. Almost like I should be putting the little guy in a frame rather than a drawer. Oh, the places it has been.

I bought my phone almost exactly 3 years ago. October 18th, 2008. I remember the date because it was the day after I found out cancer had recurred in my lymph nodes. After hearing the news, Kate drove up from Naperville to spend the weekend with me. We went to Southdale and I decided I deserved a little treat- a free treat- but a treat nontheless. I liked it because it looked like a kid's toy phone (little did I know that three years later I would have a kid who thought it was his toy). The first phone call I made was to Dr. W at UNC, tellling him I would be spending some time down in NC, fighting cancer again. I should have known from the first phone call that this phone was in it for the long haul.

Megan met me in Chicago and the little blue phone checked in with friends and family as we drove from Illinois to NC. The little blue guy went with me to the hospital on 11/11/08 as the surgeon planned to remove the cancer and cut nerves in my neck. After I woke up, it texted friends to let them know that I could still raise my arm, even after the doctors had told me I wouldn't be able to. I think my dad used it to call Jen, Angela, and Brynna to update them while they sat in Reading Railroad, waiting for word on my status. While it couldn't post updates to Facebook or send emails, it still helped me stay in touch with those in Minnesota who were thinking about me.

My faithful phone then dutifully trucked along with me to each infusion and radiation appointment. I had to hide it in the chemo room so the nurses wouldn't yell at me, but it was worth it. Being able to connect with friends far away while sitting in that recliner made life a little bit better. Having it in my purse as I drove back and forth to the hospital was a comfort to my mom who thought I shouldn't be driving at that point in my treatment.

About my mom, if my phone could tell me the one person it called the most, it would be her. We talk almost every day. She has been a constant in my unexpected, but mecry and grace-filled life the past 3 years. She has laughed with me through contractions and cried with me through life changes. And I owe that all to my phone considering she lives a thousand-plus miles away.

In the winter of 2009-2010, I rivaled Jacob Roloff in the number of texts I was sending. But Little Blue kept up. In March of 2010, I called my parents to let them know that the source of my headaches was not, in fact, a brain tumor, but a little baby. And then the phone really started going- texting Kate and Angela, calling Caitlyn, Eric, and Megan. One of the text messages still saved is from Caitlyn, "call baby Hoda. and her nickname can be Hodawoman."

I have a few voicemails that I can't bring myself to delete: a couple from my dad checking in with me, one from a college friend reciting a poem about a girl named Adrienne that he was improvising as he went along, a message from Dawn on November 8th, calling to find out if there was any baby news.

I called Dawn back early morning on November 9th to tell her I had contractions all night and that today MIGHT be the day. I was right. It was the day. I also called Melissa on the little blue phone- she took me to the doctor's office and we were told that by the end of the day, I was going to have a baby. I picked up my phone to call my mom and we cried when I told her. I don't know how many texts I sent and received that day, but I am sure it was in the hundreds. The reason I don't know is that Melissa took my phone away from me. Apparently there were more important things to do than respond to texts. Cedar was born at 8:16 PM. Kyle sent out a mass text that is still saved in my phone "It is a handsome boy...Cedar Ebenezer". I even have a picture of myself holding my new son after he was born with the phone up to my ear, calling Megan, I think. It's a boy! We all thought he was a girl.

This year, I have added a handful of new numbers to my list of contacts. Different circles, different groups...and I thank God for each one. People I never expected to get pulled into my life, and Cedar and I are all the better for it. This year my phone has called Singapore and received texts from Myanmar. Maybe around Thanksgiving, I will get a phone call from Indonesia.

So, farewell, little blue phone! Job well done.