Conflict

"Who am I? What am I like? of what evil am I not capable, in either deed or word or will? But you are good and merciful, Lord. Your right hand reached to the bottom of my heart and emptied out its dregs of death and corruption. All you asked was the I cease to want what I willed, and begin to want what you willed. "
Augustine

How easy my heart reverts to its old habits. One second I am praising Jesus with my lips and the next my sin nature creeps in and begins to take root, turning my once good desires into seeds of discontentment. One minute I am all for Him, and the next I am pining after something that is not mine. Lately, I've been desiring and praying for good (I think) things. Things that will grow me, give Jesus glory and make known the path of life to others, BUT it's been a constant struggle to keep theses desires pure. The line is so easily crossed from pleading/persevering in my prayers to longing and discontentment. I must come back to his word and remind myself of what is sure:

1. I am dead to sin (Rom 6:11)-- freed from sin's POWER over me. Being freed from sin brings LIFE, salvation, including sanctification and eternal life.

2. THEREFORE, I am commanded to not let sin reign in my body (6:12)-- Jesus' death was not a quick fix for the sin in our lives. Paul does not declare the believer dead to sin and leave it at that. There is no disconnect between the old life and new life at regeneration. He proclaims us dead to sin through Jesus, but resurrected so that “we too might walk in newness of life.” The outworking of the gospel is faith and works... it necessarily expresses itself through obedience in attitudes and manners similar to Christ.

3. Now to him who is able to establish you according to the gospel and the preaching of Jesus Christ (Rom 16:20)... I may not be able, but HE IS. If I had taken Greek instead of Hebrew I could do a little word study on establish, but instead I'll settle for the Oxford English dictionary. Establish: to found, institute, build, or bring into being on a firm or stable basis; to show to be valid or true, prove. Here I am, Jesus. Establish me.